Damon and Bonne somewhere in the cours of Evensong
by Jannie Catharina
Summary: How Bonnie and Damon give into their love and recover Bonnie from her loss of memories.


Suddenly, she closed the book she was reading in a swift motion. Head in her hands, she leaned her elbows on the table. For a moment she stared into a nothingness across the empty reading room, blank eyes and with a frown on her tired little face. She seemed to be deeply worried, exhausted too, as if she couldn't stand the fight anymore. However she knew she didn't have an answer to the struggle in her mind. She shook her head slightly as she closed her eyes, as if trying to get back to the real world. Reluctantly though, because it wasn't a place she wanted to be. Not a place she knew how to handle at the moment. Determined to get a hold on herself and move on in this completely confusing and heavy existence of hers, she straightened her back and started to pack the books in her bag. Just take one day at a time, she thought. One hour. One minute… just get back to the dorm room… just go to sleep, maybe it'll all be solved out when I wake up in the morning.

She looks too pale, Damon thought as she cleared the table of her things. He was watching her from behind a row of book shelves. Kind of like the first time he saw her, the first time he'd interfered with her mind right after she'd been attacked by the stupid werewolves at the town library of Fells Church. Back then she hadn't been oppressed with dark emotions and worries. Back then she'd been a child and her greatest concern had been not to fail her history paper. It felt like it was centuries ago. So much had happened since then. And now this madness had been going on and on, for long enough. He couldn't let it continue. He couldn't stand by and watch it go by, like logs floating by on the river. He had to make a turning point in this mad land; otherwise everybody would go insane once and for all. Unfortunately he was the only around here, who was able to do what had to be done. And he had to do it before it was too late.

He hesitated for one more minute. This was an altering step he was about to take, in every way he could think of. Stefan would not be happy to say the least, but Bonnie was picking up signals from the darker realm around her, more than the others were. Her very easily obtainable mind was too tempting for creatures of the dark and she'd even begun to understand that he could mentally control her. It scared the wits out of her. To maintain her sanity, and to save her life, she needed to understand these signals and powers.

He broke out of his sheltering hide, into the light, knowing that she would see him and that there was no way back now.

Her curly red hair was hanging down before her face and she didn't see him before his shadow settled on the table in front of her. She was startled. Her petite body almost cramped as she quickly looked up, in sheer reflex, she took a step backwards and the chair nearly turned over.

"Damon!" she gasped. "Don't do that to me! Oh my God! My heart is literally trying to come out of my chest right now." She took in air and let it out in what seemed to be almost painful gasps, hand at heart.

"Sorry," he said gently and squeezed her arm over the table. "Calm down, it's just me. Hey look at me." He leaned down to catch her eyes and stroke her cheek, almost insensibly, and yet it left soothing warmth in her mind. She sent him a judgmental scowl but she'd calmed down.

"Why are you lurking around in the shadows this late anyway? You of all should know what's on my mind these days. It sure doesn't fit into the idea of getting smaller shocks late in the evening. Besides, don't you have other places to be?" She tried to keep her cool, but she couldn't conceal a shiver in her voice. She avoided his piercing eyes while she finished packing, trying her hardest to ignore him.

Of course she was referring to Elena, but he decided to look past that.

"I know." He said. "That's actually why I'm here, you see." He just looked at her as she walked around the table, still looking down on her shoes, still keeping the largest possible distance between them she could manage, both physically and mentally. She was using her powers, not even knowing it. He let her do it. There was no need to force her. What he was about to say would catch her attention anyway.

He reached out for her when she passed by him, in her way to leave the reading room, no intention of further conversation; even though he could feel she wanted nothing but to throw herself in his arms and stay there forever. "Bonnie, wait," he said. "I need to…."

But she took a hard grip on his arm and flung it away.

"Damon, stop it," she hissed but there was an apparent undertone of deeply sad frustration. "You can't… we can't do this and you know it! She's my best friend, goodness, why can't you see that?" Tears flood her eyes and he got a glimpse of one drawing a wet line down her cheek before she turned around and hasted towards the hall way, away from him as if he was the evil himself.

This is madness, he thought. Stefan you are an idiot! This I will never forgive you. A wild rage began to burst inside of him but he subdued it and ran after the crying, breaking girl.

"Bonnie, please! Wait. Not because I make you, but because you want to."

She slowed down and glanced over her shoulder, her face racked with pain.

"Stay a while." He whispered, the words only just reached her ears. Not only because I need to let you in on a horrible secret tonight, he thought. Just _stay_ with me.

"Why? _Why_ would I do that?" She was not going to wait for an answer. She knew that he knew why she couldn't stay. And she was hurting because he kept ripping up her forbidden feelings. "Go away, Damon." She wanted to get away from this suffocating trap as fast as possible. She wanted to be alone. No, actually what she needed with all her heart was to go running to Elena and tell her everything. She felt incredibly guilty but most of all she needed a friend. A shoulder to cry on because of this impossible, agonizing situation, the one where she was in love with her best friend's boyfriend and her whole world was slowly crumbling beneath her feet. But to talk about it, was the only thing she could not do. No one could help her.

He stared at her. Not ready, and not sure how to get the situation under control. For once he felt vulnerable himself. How could he tell her everything in a way that wouldn't make her run away screaming? Tell her what he was? What she was and everything that had happened the past year that she had no memory of, because of his incautious, stubborn brother and his foolish rules of honor.

She closed her eyes and once again she turned around to escape him.

He took a step forward. Then the words came out and he couldn't stop it.

"Because I love you!"

She stopped abruptly, but she didn't turn to face him.

"I love you. Little red bird…" He raised his hand to reach for her, but let it drop again. He was almost scared himself, scared because he had finally admitted to her and most importantly, to himself, what was the obvious truth.

"What?" It was a whisper so faint, he wouldn't have heard it if he hadn't been a creature possessing unnatural powers.

He was in front of her in a second, drawn to her by a new found resolution to comfort her, and to shelter her from anything that would hurt her. He had to save her immediately, her and everyone else, from the final mental collapse. And from the unknown evil that had its residence on the fringe of his range.

He put his arms around her, gently but firmly. She didn't try to push him away, but he could feel her shaking.

"I love you." He said with the whole meaning of the words flowing as a warm steady stream through the air, striking both of them to the very core, and lingering as a long awaited flowery and most tender spring after a cold harsh winter. With a power she couldn't identify, but none the less accepted as an undeniable part of her, she sensed something break inside of him as their minds opened themselves to each other's inner visions. And he could sense that she was fighting a wordless struggle at the edge of sanity. He had to act fast.

He loosened his grip just enough for him to look down at her, but she refused to lift her head from his chest.

"Bonnie. My redbird. I need to talk to you."

She raised her eyes. They were wet and despondent.

"But we can't…" was all she could say, she choked and he felt the hopelessness in her heart.

"It's not about that. I have to help you. I can't stand to see you this way. Or Elena for that matter, you do know I do love her. Not in the right way though." His eyes turned distant, looking at something in a faraway place. He shook his head and a half laugh passed his lips. "Ironic huh. I had to get her all to myself to finally see that."

He suddenly got present again and took a firm grip on her shoulders, looking her straight in the eyes. "I'm not the right one for her. I know that now. He is out there going crazy without her, and she is here, going crazy without him along with all of you. All of us I guess. And now I want to reverse this whole chaotic mess before it takes us all in. I want to give you a gift. I'll give you back your memory and then I need you to help me make everything right."

I need _you_ he thought to himself, trying to cling to the very innocent being of her pure soul with every inch of his yearning mind.

She looked at him like he was the only one in the room who was being completely mad.

"My memo… _what_ are you talking about?" Once again she tried to free herself from his strong hands but he held on to her, not only with his physical strength. The new glowing connection between them was actually tying them together. It was impossible for her to move away from him.

He felt it too, strong and clear like the glowing sun on his skin. Even though it was hard for him to remember how that really felt like. He was not easily amazed but he had to admit, this was pure brilliant beauty, even to him, and he couldn't help but enjoy it, from head to the tip of his toes. And other than that – he had her standing here, listening to his words, that most likely already sounded like mere crazy talk, and not once it had been necessary to influence her. The connection between them did the work.

"I know you haven't been yourself lately. Nothing has been normal here since… well we'll come back to that…" No need to mention a person she has no memory of at this point. Will just make it worse, he thought. We can talk about Stefan when I have healed her brain. "You've felt like you were going crazy, right? Like the one thing you're missing keeps slipping your mind. Like something isn't right and there is something you ought to know. It's right on the tip of your tongue but you just can't seem to get a grasp at it. Am I right?"

She looked at him with big, brown, wondering eyes.

"How did you know? That's exactly how I feel!"

"Well… it doesn't matter how I know right now. But I do have the answers, and I can help you get a hold of the clutter in your head. Also I need you to have a clear head if you are going to help me help Elena and Meredith. And Matt too - of course."

The confusion in her head magnified another level. She tried in vain to gather her thoughts around what had just happened but instead, she felt a heavy black cloud descend on her. Suddenly she felt much older and a lot more tired. This was not possible. Damon loved her? There really was something missing? And he could help her… She was not going crazy? Oh my God, I'm crazier than ever, she thought. A cold dizziness surrounded her and she let Damon support her. She even let him stroke her hair; his fingers exploring her curly ringlets for a moment. She melted into his body heat, and hoped that she would drown there – forget about everything terrible, finally.

No. This wasn't right. She _could_ not, no matter what had just happened in the space between them, do this to Elena. She pulled herself together.

"Damon," she said. Still resting her head against his disturbingly soothing chest, she took a hold on his shirt and clung to it, one last desperate try to change the world, so that it would be okay for her to be in his arms. "I don't know what you're suggesting, but I _can't_ do it. I told you. I'm just not that kind of person. Whatever just happened _has_ to go away and be forgotten as fast as possible. I'm sorry." Sorrier than you will ever know, she thought.

 _Oh but I know, my little redbird, and everything is going to be all right,_ he said to her, comfortably. He made sure to diminish his mental voice so that she wouldn't be sure if it was just her own imagination. She did catch the sound of it though and looked at him, questions already on her lips. She wasn't scared, though. He felt how she'd thrown in the towel by now. Nothing could catch her by surprise anymore, she'd gone insane, and there was nothing she could do about it.

"Okay, look," he said, an attempt to distract her thoughts. "Let me help you with this. Let me give you my gift, and after that I promise, I won't ever touch you again in any way, unless you want me to. Just let me do this one thing."

Oh so tiered. She wanted to sit down at the least but most of all she felt like she could sleep right here, right now. Right here in these strong arms. He was so strong… She jerked away from him at last. No, Bonnie, stop it, _now_.

"Okay," she said. "One thing. But can we please go somewhere and sit down for a while?"

He took her to his room. She was so worn out, she didn't even stop to think about the rules they broke on the way to the boy's floor this late. She thought about Damon. This was all in such contrast to… To what? To Someone else… To him? Who he used to be? She couldn't find the thought she was looking for and it gave up. Someone sarcastic and somewhat vicious with the glow of danger about him, kept displaying for her inner eye, but he looked like Damon. I'm surely going totally crazy, she thought while she surrendered – _just for this moment though_ \- and leaned on him the whole way, letting him lead her gently, making her feel safe and shielded from anything that could hide in the shadows at the end of her sight.

As they closed the door to Damon's dorm room, Bonnie was at the edge of a severe breakdown. She was as pale as the moon and she felt like throwing up. She shouldn't be here. What was Elena doing right now? Didn't she wonder where Damon was? His own room was rarely used these days. He had been living in Elena's room, that way he would always be near her, ready to protect her from whoever put her in the hospital in the beginning of the semester.

"I put her to sleep," he said as if he was answering her thoughts. "She won't wake up anytime soon, and she will be safe. Don't worry."

I'm a creep. I'm a treacherous bitch and I'm going to leave right now, she thought. Unfortunately, she could barely stand up any longer; she was too weak from fatigue and devastating sorrow.

He rearranged the furniture so they could sit face to face, one on the bed and one on the old late renascence chair he'd imported from Italy. He made a gesture towards the bed, but she looked at him with an offended expression, like she couldn't believe he would ask her that.

He suppressed a smile and said, "I'll be sitting on the chair little miss. I'm not trying to insult you." And you will probably be needing something to fall on to when I'm done with you, my little redbird, he thought to himself as he performed a slight and elegant bow, as if making up for a rude approach.

For a moment she got the feeling he was amused, but then he grabbed her by the hand and led her to the bed, sat her down and placed himself across from her on the chair. She was simply too overwhelmed with tonight's emotion on top of the past weeks increasing tension to resist.

"All right. Now look at me. Good. You feel tired. But you can't go to sleep quite yet, little redbird, my flaming little goddess of loyalty and innocence. Stay with me. But slide into the weightless darkness with me for a while." Her eyes became blank as she slipped into the space between worlds. "That's right, just like that. Come on now, all relaxed and dissolved in to the atmosphere. Now let me enter. Let me in and I will save you from your madness, ease your pain. I will undo what was done to you in an act of desperation and despair."

As she felt his calm voice, soft as the petals of a rose, stroking every aching corner of her mind, she fell and fell. He didn't leave her side; he just kept holding her in his arms. They floated through a weird, empty universe and nothing could ever reach them or do them any harm. Not when he was here. She always knew that. He would never let anyone harm her as long as he was alive. Though she had let her scare before, she always knew that. He was no cold blooded murderer. He was Damon, her savior and her life spark. She only felt the bewilderment in a glimpse - why would Damon ever be called a cold blooded murderer? Then it was gone. He made his way into her inner soul, into her brain. She felt a flash of panic but he instantly laid an emotional sedative blanket around her, consisting of the unleashed love that had evoked in him, just moments ago.

He went on. Breaking entrances, destroying barriers, mending the spaces of emptiness his brother had left, that kept her from remembering. Bit by bit, he brought back everything Stefan had taken away from her.

You did a good job, little brother, he thought. I's harder than I thought, you've really been thorough. It'll be a hard job to remedy what you broke in these humans. But it's the only way.

He could feel her reactions when something unbelievable revealed for her eyes. I'm a _witch_!? Elena Died… came back a vampire, died again, came back in my dreams, came back and saved us all from the mad wicked Klaus who would have destroyed us all. Came back a human girl. Meredith is a vampire slayer. The dark Dimension. They were all held as Damon's slaves to be able to enter and live there. Sage, their mystic companion and friend, a vampire of the Dark Dimension and even lower dimensions. The fox demon Shinichi and his cruel sister Misao, who almost succeeded in exterminating the whole town. All the possessed teenagers who'd harmed themselves and others. Mrs. Flowers who had helped them and made the boarding house a hiding place for all of them, the base from where they were in battle with evil powers. The Guardians in The Celestial Court who had made it all undone, so they could go home, as if nothing bad had ever happened in Fells Church. All who had died, came back to life –except for Damon. Damon. The dark, sarcastic and dangerous Damon who they'd never really knewn if could be trusted. But Damon who had protected her when he unintentionally brought her back to the Dark Dimension with him, after he accidentally unsealed and used the magic black rose, intended for Stefan to become human and live a normal mortal life with his beloved Elena. A kiss. A kiss in the flying air, when he told her he was sorry to have treated her badly. The blood they had shared, once when he saved her life, and later when they had all saved his life after he had projected the punishing slashed from the whip indented for Elena, to his own body. Damon. He had died to save her life on the moon of the Underworld. They had brought him back from his half death under the ashes of the moon.

Wait – the magic intended for whom now, to live a normal life with his beloved Elena?! And then he found his way back into her consciousness, where he thought he would never find himself ever again. Stefan! She saw how he first came to Robert E. Lee High, and swept everybody off their feet. His sunglasses, curly black hair and Italian leather jacket, his green eyes, the shade of spring leafs. The Porsche. How Elena had fallen in love with him, Stefan, not Damon, and how they had sworn in blood, Meredith and herself, to do whatever Elena asked them to do regarding to Stefan, and how Elena had sworn never to rest until he was hers. How their hard work paid off, and how they loved each other endlessly. But then everyone came to hate Stefan and Elena because of the murders and attacks. Damon, the hateful brother, who'd wanted to take Elena for himself and had scared them all. Katherine. The crazy vampire that looked like Elena, who was Damon and Stefan's long lost love. The reason they became vampires, and then the reason that they came to Fells Church 500 years later. Damon, under influence of Shinichi he had made Stefan leave, believing he could become a human again, but got imprisoned in the Dark Dimension, which was the reason they had to go there. Caroline and Taylor and the werewolf cubs.

Her life flashed for her eyes in what seemed to be forever. It all came back, slowly but surely. Damon was very careful in his work; he didn't want to leave anything important out. Actually, he didn't want to leave anything at all out. He wanted to give her back _everything_.

Hours passed. It was much harder to build up than to tear down. He kept holding the tiny body of her inner self, calming her down when pictures got too heavy and unbearable and when she was shocked and frightened as she relived everything.

He had never worked like this before, certainly not for such a long time. He began to feel his powers weaken. He needed to finish. He needed to feed. He was aware that he couldn't go hunting with Bonnie being all fragile after his interference, and Elena sleeping alone in her room. He had to stay. The savage face of Panic smiled at him and he shivered. But then something happened. Bonnie freed her arms from his protective grip and then she held him. Her hands were seeking to rescue him, the way he rescued her. She gave him strength through her very own life source, and her own intense Power which began to take form and awaken.

 _You need to finish_ , she said to him, aware that they could only do this once. It was too much of an effort for both of them to construct this active merging of minds and remedy again. She felt him fade in her arms and his voice was weak.

 _Just a little bit more… I'm almost fin…_ He quaked in a painful contraction; he no longer had the strength to hold her and to work at the same time.

 _Keep going, Damon. I can hold myself now_ , she thought to him and gave him Power trough their cured mental connection. She didn't know why she could do it, she had never done anything like that before, but she just did it. Encouraged by the love they shared and the fact that she needed to be completely mended. _And promise me to go gather strength again, when we are done. You need it. We both need you to be at your strongest._

Finally. He felt like he had been ripped apart and put back together. He was back on the chair in the dorm room. Bonnie was looking at him, tears streaming down her face, eyes big with every emotion she had just lived through all over again. Heavy breathing filled out the room along with her deepest concern for him and the newborn reconcile of love, tying their hearts together.

"Are you okay?" She could barely speak. She felt a blazing need to be as close to him, as she could possibly get, but the second she got up, she fell to the ground as if there were no bones in her body.

"No, don't get up…" He said at the same time. He's voice was hoarse. With the last strain he could draw, he got her up from the floor and placed her on the bed. She had passed out. Good. She needed rest. And he needed food.

His thirst was insatiable. He went from one girl to another. Some of them remembered his gifts of pleasure when he entered their rooms. Some didn't and some of them he hadn't enjoyed the bracing blood from before. He drank and drank, but he drank, only to satisfy his burning thirst and to mend his drained powers. He couldn't seem to give into the hunt and the joy of devouring his prey. He just drank, cold-hearted, hasty, absent-minded. The first couple of young women were unusually hard to manipulate when he was done, which meant that they wanted him to stay. He worked up a mood and a distracting impatience. He just wanted to be done. He wanted to go check on Elena and more than anything he wanted to go back to his room, where Bonnie was lying in his bed, tucked in, in a profound and healing sleep. He wanted to rest by her side for a while, and not be forced to take important decisions and be aware of the messy reality that surrounded them. He wanted to discover more about his new shimmering connection to Bonnie. It had always been there, he thought. He just didn't see it. And now that he did, a whole new world had opened itself up before his eyes. He smiled harshly. Apparently he hadn't been ready before. But nothing was really like before, now was it.

He felt his powers return, finally. With the break of dawn, he left the last girl in a sweet dream and set off towards Elena's dorm room. He knew Bonnie was going to be sleeping for yet a long time after last night's harrowing experiences.

He entered Elena's mind already before he let himself in through the door. He had to implement the idea that he had been there all night. It had become quite the habit to make her forget and make her give in to him. She was strong even as a human and it was getting to him to use all that energy on manipulating her. Besides he began to consider it disrespectful against all that she was and all the battles she had won against pure evil so fare. She deserved to be her whole self. This was just degrading.

He gazed down at her. Pure, golden beauty on a lavender background, that was. I'm sorry princess, he thought. I will sort this all out, I promise. He felt a sting of remorse and wondered why suddenly it seemed to be so clear to him what he had to do, when he hadn't been able to see it before. He wasn't sad, not even angry or one bit resentful now that he had, at long last, realized that she didn't belong to him in the way he had wanted her to. They would always have a bond between them. They would always be tied together by everything that had happened, by every time they had touched each other's minds. They would always love each other. He kissed her as lightly as a summer sky's cotton cloud. Always, princess. You saved my soul, you opened up my heart. But you don't belong to me and I can't make you, even though I tried. And as much as he had tried, as much his love for Bonnie had grown inevitable and impossible to ignore any longer.

Nothing unusual happened that morning. Elena got up, got ready for classes, kissed him and lingered in his arms for a while, trying to seek shelter from the unknown source of distress that haunted her every day and every night. Took off.

Damon sent out a web of power. Bonnie was still asleep, recovering her strength. Elena - somewhere trying to keep attention to some indifferent teacher. She had become more and more indifferent in general lately. He felt her gloom like a heavy rug, weighing down on her shoulders. She knew deep down, in the darkest recesses of her soul, that something was missing and that the pure intense love and longing she felt didn't quite tally with the person he was. She knew something had been stolen from her heart. She was fumbling in desperation through memories she no longer had. And in addition Bonnie kept scaring them all with her trances and everything was just wrong.

She woke up with a start. Eyes wide open and stared at the ceiling while she tried to remember where she was. What had happened, that was so important she could feel it in every cell of her body. She was in a bed. In her bed. The ceiling looked weird, though. Was it not her bed after all? She sat up. This was not her room. She wasn't even in Fells Church, she was lucid aware of that. Where were Elena and Stefan, hadn't they just been on a dangerous journey together? What had happened last night? They had been before the Celestial Court. Elena had made the Guardians give them back their lives. They'd made it! She had to be back in Fells Church. In her house. In her bed. But this was definitely not her room at all. She shook her head. No, no. That was all just a dream. Nothing bad had happened. She was in her dorm room at the collage in Dallcrest. Right. That was it. There was no Stefan and Elena was, of course, sleeping in her room with Damon by her side, perfectly safe too.

Damon! She felt as if she was hit in the chest and she couldn't breathe. Once again, she took a look around. This was Damon's room – or more accurately, Stefan's old room, which Damon had apparently taken over when they switched places. He took her here after… and then he… She almost couldn't believe it, when she started to recall last night's astounding pass off. She was totally and completely shaken, but at the same time everything fell into places inside of her. She felt whole and mended. Nothing was blurred out and strange anymore, everything she needed was in her reach. Of course the incredible things that had happened between her and Damon really were strange, to say the least. He loved her. He had brought back all of her memories. And he had been so gentle and cautious with her, totally in contrast to the moody intimidating dark vampire she'd first met. At this moment though, the very thought of him sent chills down her spine.

Then suddenly, the door unlocked and there he was. They stared at one another with big expectant eyes and for once he looked like he didn't know what to say. But the moment passed and he got a noticeable hold of himself. He closed the door without touching it and approached her slowly.

"Good morning sunshine," he said as softly as the morning sunshine, while slowly, he took the few steps that separated them. He swept a red curl away from her face and sat down on the bedside. They breathed in each other's presence and he gently placed a finger on her chin, lifting her face so he could press his lips against hers. Softly he kissed her, his lips lingering on hers, his hand tenderly on her cheek.

Oh goodness, I don't know if I can take this, she thought. Her whole body was trembling from the energy his touch transmitted. Not once in her life, had she _ever_ felt anything like this. She was at the absolute right place at the right time, drifting into that golden, flicker of joy and happiness. This time she accepted it. She whirled into the tenderness of his touch. She was flying again and this time she didn't have to fall down. She knew that Stefan was out there, and Stefan would come and save Elena.

He pulled away, just enough to look her in the eyes. He gave into her too. He wanted to drown in the sea of her young, blunt, innocent essence. To hold her like this, the sensation of the little bird resting in his arms, not trying to take a flight or to push him away, sent warm tendrils of joy through his body. For once, he was the one accepting the gift of pleasure, he was the victim.

"Remember what I said about coming home… to rest in your nest?" he whispered.

She nodded. It was at the same time as real and right as it could ever be, and then completely out of mind. Here she sat with _Damon_ by her side. Elena's Damon, Stefan or no Stefan, talking about settling down. With a blood thirsty vampire. And she wanted to sit here forever if only she could. Sadly, all the questions could not be held in any longer. They both knew they had serious work to attend to.

"I know, we have to talk about that some other time," he said and gave her a little encouraging smile and a kiss to her forehead.

"Oh Damon. This is all _too_ much." She was quiet for a little while, gathering her thoughts. Then: "I can't believe how all this happened. What really happened, Damon? Why did I forget everything and why isn't Stefan here with Elena? Why have you been her boy friend instead of him?"

He took a deep breath. Stefan had caught everyone before they reached Elena at the hospital, which meant, Bonnie had never discovered what really happened to Elena that night. This was not a memory he could have brought back. It had never been there.

He told her everything.

Bonnie was quiet. So many thoughts ran through her head. There was a time when she would have bet her life, that this would have been Damon's big dream come true.

"But… Elena…" She didn't know how to finish the sentence.

"She _was_ what I wanted." He answered her quietly. "You're right. No one could've doubted that. But you feel this too, I know you do. That ought to answer your questions just fine. I can't deny it, no more than you can. And I can't let you go crazy at the cost of it. Neither can I let Elena wither and die without Stefan. She needs him, every inch of her body and soul does."

Bonnie knew he was right. "How could he _do_ this," she whispered. "How could he _possibly_ think there could be a life without him, with everything that we've all been through?"

"Well, yes. I am going need to have a very serious word with the boy as soon as possible," he muttered.

"But… where is he?"

"Frankly I don't know, redbird. I can't seem to get in contact with him anywhere."

"But, Damon. We have to find him, fast, so we can tell everyone about all this." She looked right at him with her big brown eyes and then she shook her head with a deep sigh and made a dramatizing gesture with her arms. "Oh and it's just _awful_ not being able to talk to Elena and Meredith. How in the world is this going to end if we don't find him?"

"I know," he said softly, whishing there was anything he could say to comfort her. To himself he thought, now that I have you back from that half sleeping state of yours, it feels like a silly parade pretending that I am Elena's boy friend. He stared at the fragile, little being in front of him. So beautiful, with her flaming hair and her big honest eyes. So strong in her will to help her loved ones. Strong enough to cross bridges she was deadly afraid of, he'd seen it before. He knew what she saw in the shadows, when she opened her mind. Her powers came with a limpid vision, which revealed terrible sights. And yet she'd decided to keep them, when she was given the choice to be untied from them. Like a little young bird she had to be protected for anything in the world. He'd only just realized last night. He'd always just done it - saved her, protected her. Now he knew that it was a natural part of him and he welcomed it. He wanted it. He'd been blind. He'd even denied it. Occupied and dazzled with his desire for Elena.

"Okay, we have to have a plan. What can we do, what are our possibilities?" A sigh slipped her lips. "Elena would definitely know what to do."

"We do too," he said and put his arms around her again to make her relax, while he kept talking, his cheek against her hair. "We need to find Stefan. We need to get everyone's memories back, which we can only do when Stefan is back. It would destroy Elena to know the truth if he's still not here. And we need to find out who puts these other girls in the hospital, drained for blood. Also, there are werewolves in the woods, so you have to be careful. Apparently they have some sort of interest in you."

She nodded. "So where do we start."

He didn't answer. She felt the intensity in his embrace amplify. She leaned back a bit to get a look at his eyes. She drew in her breath. Those eyes; they had tiny, shiny, glittering stars in the ocean of blackness. He looked at her with eager passion, drank in the sight of her, longing for her, sparkling for her. She trembled in his solid grip, and let him kiss her again. She kissed him back, with just the tiniest sting of anxiety.

"Only if you want to," he whispered, leaning his forehead to hers. "Like I said yesterday, and I meant it – I won't ever do anything to you, that you don't want me to."

She trusted him not to hurt her; she even wanted it to happen. Her whole being yearned to have him, all of him and for him to have all of her in one act of love. She wanted them to tie as strongly as possible, so they could stand against anything together. But Elena kept coming between them. Elena still thought Damon was her boyfriend. She'd begun to unravel by the subconscious knowledge that Damon wasn't the soul mate she needed, but none the less - he was supposed to be her boyfriend, her protector.

"Damon…" Hand on his chest she tried to keep a distance between them. Breathing seemed harder and harder to do.

"It's too late," he whispered while dragging her closer. "You're already in my blood, love… you're under my skin. I will protect her 'till the day I die, you know I will. But right now I need you. She can't come between us." His voice was as soft as black silk against her skin. It incased her, body and soul. She knew he wasn't lying. He really did need her; he needed her to give him all the power he could get to prepare for the fight they both knew was coming. But that wasn't all. He simply couldn't wait any longer to show her how he really felt and to get closer than closest. There was no manipulation, just sheer affection – tender desire.

He kissed her, tilted her head, still kissing her - her lips, her cheek, her neck. Slowly, his mouth brushed over her sensitive skin, caressing her, searching…

 _I will take you anywhere you want to go, my little beautiful bird; to the end of the world if you want to. To the stars, they're all yours, just say the words. We have all the time we want._

All her doubts vanished. They belonged to each other. Even before, in the faraway past it seemed, the safest place she'd ever been was in his arms.

They forgot everything around them. They just merged in their own little love nest, and for a time, there didn't exist any danger or worry.

"Please hurry," she whispered and put her arms as fare around herself as she could. She suddenly felt cold and alone just by the thought of him leaving. It was scary out there, but it was almost just as scary in here. She could go into a trance anytime, and she didn't want her mind to be occupied by some evil creature with no Damon around.

"I will. But the good thing is that now you can protect yourself, yeah? You're strong, love, you will be okay," he said and tried to drag her closer.

She took a step back.

"Stop saying that. I'm not as strong as you think." Tears pooled in her eyes.

He was surprised. "I know you're afraid, little redbird. But remember, I have seen you do courageous things. Being scared but walking right in anyway, if that's not a symptom of strength and courage, well I really don't know what is. Besides, I won't go further than my Power reaches without telling you, I promise."

Most of all she felt like clinging to him and beg him not to go, but not only did she not want to lose her dignity, she also knew that there was no other way. He had to go fin Stefan, and she had to stay here. Who knew what veiled in the dark out there.


End file.
